The clouds parted; the sun came out, and I screamed

Thank god for backups. Let me say it again… THANK GOD FOR BACKUPS! Its Easter morning and with coffee in hand, I marvel at the clear, blue sky above me after the dramatic presentation of the elements yesterday. Julie is at church, and I have the morning to myself… just me and the kitty.

I make my way into the office (with somewhere between a saunter and a stagger) and continue my quest for software. I recently formatted my laptop, and needed to reinstall my software.

At this point, let me chase a metaphorical butterfly off the trail and into the field a bit. To know me, is to know my prowess for computers, and my penchant for gadgetry. I consider myself pretty net-savvy and exercise caution and discretion when called upon. I have redundant security from firewalls to real-time software protection. It’s not as secure as the Pentagon, (I hope) but then again, I’m not responsible for any National secrets… just my wife’s PhD program documents.

Ok… back on the trail… I wanted to download a download manager (yes, I see the irony here). In order to get the free program, - (clue #1 I missed) I needed to download a different program first (clue #2). Perhaps I was insufficiently caffeinated; not paying attention or just plain dumb… I don’t know, I clicked the button and the hard drive began to make a lot of activity noise. Not the soothing whirr that it normally whispers as it is fetching a file, or executing a command. This was more like a pepper grinder… with a motor. Then the pop-ups started.

The first one was NOT the gentle warning one might expect. Perhaps I watch too many Navy movies:

Ensign: Sounding excited: “Sonar to COM… come-in COM.”
Captain: Calm and controlled, “Go ahead Sonar.”
Ensign: “Uh, Skipper… we have an unidentified sonar ping at zero-two-niner, over.”
Captain: “Ok Ensign, keep an eye on it.”

- Minutes later -

Ensign: High-pitched, nearing panic “Sonar to COM… come-in COM.”
Captain: Calm and controlled, “Go ahead Sonar... take it easy son.”
Ensign: “Wehavetwotorpedoescomingin… ETAforty-fiveseconds”!
Captain: Calm and controlled, “Take evasive action.”

If this were my ship… this is what this communication might have sounded like

Ensign: High-pitched, completely panicked, “SonartoCO”!
Glub… glub… glub… glub

I was able to fire off a screenshot of the warning I got before I was eatin’ seaweed…